That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize