i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize