she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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