How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
