I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
