I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
