You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
