I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Randomize
