We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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