there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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