Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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