Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
