2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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