i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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