; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
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I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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