And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
