No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
