Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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