He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
