Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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