i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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