He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
