Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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