I think im going to throw up on grandma
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
