My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
