took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
