i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
