Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i would punch a child for taco bell
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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