Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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