ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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