in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Randomize
