im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Dick very happy bro
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
