Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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