we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
