Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Drake has all the answers
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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