Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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