I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
