I'm so fucking centered right now
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
