I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
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