Pappa wants mamma naked
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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