He kissed a someone with a penis
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize