She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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