wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
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For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?