We're like a lot better than the average bears
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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