Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
