Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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