Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize