Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
