i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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