I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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