before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
